dreambabies

ive been having dreams again...prolly due to weird sleeping hours.
In one, I was trying to save people from some sort of domestic pool filled with like quicksand that was adjacent to a beachfront. But then the ground was giving away and chunks of land were falling, and there was a giant hole filled with brown fuzzy hair, that seemed to go to the earths' core. I saved two little kids from falling in but i fell. However, i quickly grabbed hold of the hair.
I looked up, and there was the face of a woman whos hair i was holding on to, who apparently had been just beneath the surface of the earth...waiting for someone to uncover her. Still hanging on to her hair, I looked down, and could see, despite there being mile long hair going down the hole, a pair of legs that also traveled the length of this hole. The women then said to me something like, "there are more to be saved, go." I then looked down, and let go of the hair. I fell a ways down, then caught myself. I repeated this action several times, until i couldn't see light.
I never got to the bottom.

i wonder what was down there.

G-mail

Today i gave a presentation on Kung Fu and Blaxploitation. After I completed it, the TA asked me why this was relevant. I had no idea what to say. It was really embarassing, my brain was fizzlefried, and it really showcased how I have no insight into the Asian American experience, and how I haven't read anything in that class, nor understand most of the concepts....she kept reformatting the question, but still nothing. I just sort of gave up and then someone else answered another question....
ive had problems with this TA before....mostly im refering to when she sent me a threatening letter after I left class during the lecture one day. Maybe she has it in for me....im a white male......
but hey, ill never have to deal with bad depictions of me on screen right? and Ill prolly make more money than her always just because im white...so i dont blame her.....or wait, thats not true....

Im prolly wrong....but in comparison to all the classes Ive taken that deal with the African American experience....Asian Americans just can't hold their jocks.
But im very glad with being done with the presentation....i sort of have nothing to do for a few days....that's difficult atleast.

....i fixed the ads at the top of the page. There is only one again....i dont know if its ever just been one......but it is now.

2 year blowout party

welcome to the 2 year anniversary of this shitty website!

we have soda to your left, and cookies to the right. the pizza will be here momentarily. The DJ is spinning top40, if youd like to make a request, go right ahead, and dance if you'd like.

oh, and may i take your coat?

"id like to thank everyone for coming out, and celebrating. Time has flown by hasn't it? I just want to thank everyone for dedicating their lives to me on an irregular basis. Thank you so much for reading my bullshit, it makes me feel so much more special than the average person. I think a lot of the goals i had in mind with this site, failed miserably. But hey! We got orange and grape soda, and they're playing my favorite song, so lets get down!"

nice to know im rated...

My life is rated NC-17.
What is your life rated?

4/20celebration

not really, school is too consuming for pot...for me, plus i hate being high.

time gets so much faster as you get older. this is trite, i know. But damn. I can feel it about to make that jump from the semi-quick pace of college to that ultra-swift pace of real life.
I have memories from childhood, they all seem reggae paced. All the memories seem so much longer than ones i have of things that happened a couple of years ago. Like simple moments from childhood are equally represented to things like going to a particular concert or something like that. My pace now is like a decently paced beatles song....but in the future its sounds like....a rolling metal song.
I wonder if this changes once your 50 or 60, to an annoying drum roll/techno song....or if you just stop caring, and forget about them, after a lifetime of realizing how unimportant they are in many ways, except to you.
I dedicate a lot of time thinking about stupid shit like this. I think way too much about how I exist, and how delicate life is and how weird it is. I stare at things I've seen a thousand times, and think about what the fuck it really is. Or like, how people say things you hear all the time, but even so, there is still meaning there, that is almost too cliche to acknowlege as real.
Is this getting too American Beauty? or shitty? fuck it.
Idunno, I dont know if i could live 3 or 4 more 20 year periods with all these questions....i will develop new distractions.
Prolly heroin or something, but a distraction nonetheless.

I saw Artie, an old half-way-friend, whom most of you know. He is married with a child, but still going to school. I told him how, after school, I will either puss out and try to get a job at a television station/company in texas or move to LA, for a couple+ years. I dont think ive really told anyone that outright before. I think about it a lot. It would be the hardest thing ive done so far in life.
i long to entertain you.

...

one little thing....is anyone else really fascinated by the links listed on the "blogspot" ads at the top of the page? how they find keywords and topics that I discuss........its all so....

...

i bank

oh shit....im all up in da cashes at tha black eye P. Fuckin rollin in that shit.
Not really....i actually found out i have to PAY 480 dollars for my taxes because of my summer job, that did not take out social security or anything. Which was cool, but now...is very lukewarm.
But jesus.....thank god...i no longer exist in poverty for the moment...I bought a fucking 12 pack of redstripe the other day for fucks sake. Thats like a dollar a beer, which is insane....for me.
But honestly...I even have enough money to get a 4,000 mile overdue oil change!
Speaking of my car....my sister...who in november wrecked her full sized chevy truck one week after getting it on her birthday...is now "retreating" back to the SATURN. She will be getting the exact same kinda car as mine, except one year older, and with a sun roof. I dont like sun roofs, so its all good.

Hellboy = good not-so-popcorn, popcorn movie....despite me not having any popcorn.
busy week ahead....cant you all just feel your cleats hitting homeplate?

Tomorrow at 7, on campus...they are showing "JESUS CHRIST VAMPIRE HUNTER" which is a story about exactly what the title sounds like....so everyone should go with me.

a cool 60 hours & film

this weekend was cool for some reason. I was really apprehensive about it, because I was to wait tables at "tha pea" for the first time without backup. But after doing it, I think everything is going to be alright. Im not the best "salesperson," but atleast i know now that i can actually take orders and talk to people in an audible manner, consistently. Im sure it will get harder, as they give me busier and longer shifts. But im not afraid too much anymore. Saturday was a drunken day. At 8:30 in the morning, I had a meeting to taste wine for work. So i went in to work with a fuzzy wine buzz. Later i went to kevins and drank a couple of beers. Later I bought a huge bottle of cheap whiskey and drank til I vomited. It was awesome.....Coming off of my first day of waiting tables victorious, and not having to do anything sunday...i think I actually felt cheery.
Nothing could cheer Amy up....
i think we may have had a yin-yang weekend....and saturday night was kinda like those two adjacent dots. Maybe.

***my film "lint" will be played on the Austin Music Network @ 11pm-11:30pm (sometime in that timeslot) on thursday night. Finally! So if you read this, and actually haven't seen it......AnD live in austin.....here is your chance!