i want more

and who doesn't?
Whether your a stock broker on walstreet, a fat man with a phonebook of delivery services, or a green peace officer saving the world, one closed animal testing facility at a time.

you want more. you need more. but your not getting enough. Nothing is ever enough. Give a man a million dollars and he will find a way to make a million more....or buy a million dollars worth of fried chicken until the money's gone, and he is left unsatiated.

I'm expecting more in 007, but I don't think it will happen...but it's all about working toward imaginary goals. Whether I fancy myself finding a way to make a lot more money doing what im doing in texas, finding my way into a graduate program, or moving to LA or New York...it's all imaginary. Fuck, Tomorrow is imaginary. Working for a personal idea of a good life. Makes me wish I was much more religious...seems like it would be a tiny bit easier to perscribe.

Don't sin....do whatever else....do what you think Jesus would do....read the good word...attend church. Seems easier to attain happiness....if one could be content doing that. I'd like to think that's why we get old...to eventually come to a simple happiness...a childlike wonderment with the end of life...similar to the beginning. But not everyone gets old. How frenetic and unfair life seems in certain frames of mind. But I choose the frame.

I don't know enough philosophy to be writing like this. I should fill your minds with my personal life updates and opinions on more palpable subjects....or maybe the original topic.

What the fuck should I do with my life?
Is the answer that I'm already doing it? And to just keep moving forward and drop the stress element, knowing that I will never transition into some unachievable stable life. There's plenty of examples in people I grew up with, now with a lot of scratch, who are bored, and are finding more solace in alcohol than even me.
I know that's what I should do...but stress is the enemy....nor a friend of me....and will always be something I refer to as earthly....in order to affirm my idea that in death there is no stress.....whether there is a heaven or a birth into nothingness....atleast both provide a lack of stress....i pray.

Tonsils expanding their range...puss visiting the lip...knee in need of a bed and rest....hair falling from the corners of my head....black circles buying property under my eyes....we all press on......mark my grace.

i believe in magic.

sxsw 2007...

What a fantastic amalgam of moments this was this year.
Ill try to make an impromtu list of things.....actually i think ill copy this others blogs list and replace the events, and add and subtract a few.

Best Show By Someone I've Never Seen: Has to be Kiiiii. These intensely crazy pop rap experimental japanese girls rocked the house like the Fresh Prince of bel aire.

Best Show By Someone I've Seen: Brother Ali. Saw him twice in fact. I think im convinced enough to buy his new album.

Best Party: The only one I went to of course was the David Cross hosted "mess with texas" party. It started off with an absolutely brilliant speech by andrew wk. After meeting them Brian Posehn and David Cross put on some hilarious stand up comedy. And all my "bored" friends left to watch some band called Polyphonic Spree.....i got really drunk alone.

Best Venue: Flamingo Cantina. I had never been there beforei liked the staging, being that it was open on two ends rather than one....and we were able to get very close. Risers on the side for other peeps....i was impressed. and the sound was good. Also...they had like 16 ounce red stripe....not that i got one....but i liked the option. But also I have to mention Visions....which gave me a vicious pat down each time i went in the place.

Worst Venue: Emos main stage....especially during the performace of Cage.

Best Celebrity Sighting: Slash. I gave him a high five thinking it was just someone dressed like Slash. It wasn't.

Most Nostalgic Moment: Seeing Rage Against the Machine sans Zach dela Rocha, play.

Best Food: I ate really cheaply the entire time.....i guess the best food i had aside from pizza and tacos....was tacos at "baby a's"

Most Heard Complaint: "This Line isn't moving." I guess I need to get a badge rather than wristband next year....or not.

Band I Wanted To See And Didn't: The Presidents of the United States of America. The line wouldn't move. Also the The Pippettes

Best Band I Didn't Expect To Like A Fuck Ton: The PPT. These hip hop guys that ransacked the ME television studio last year were really funny to me...i didn't expect their show to be as fun almost as the Gift of Gab/Lyrics Born w/ Galactic show.

Best In-Between Banter: Daughters. The lead singer speaks in drunken grunts inbetween spitting flem down his pants and licking audience members. it was awesome.

Scariest Moment: Joanna. Pretty much anytime I was around her in public places....or at amy's....or when she was driving wasted around a city she has barely been in.

Band I Saw But Shouldn't Have: CAGE. This was the worst fucking hip hop i have ever heard....with equally shitty fans.

Best Dressed: Kiiiii. Most colorful anyways....

Funniest Moment: Joanna calling me telling me she had been driving around austin for 3 hours looking for riverside....that was actually the funniest thing thats happened in awhile.

Weirdest Moment: When I predicted everything that would happen after some people decided to go hang out at the pool in amy's apt. "There they go...guranteed there will be somone that pulls a knife on someone....and there will probably be a sword....and then someone will be bleeding...and they will all rush back here all excited that their lives aren't boring"

Best Cover: Rage covering "this land is your land" on St. Patricks day...made me feel inspired.

Cutest Girl Band: I just realized Kiiiii was the only all female group I saw. they were hot.

Best Line By Someone Drunk Anywhere: Toss Up. Demetrios saying "i've got to put a cheese plaza in my bank roll....DON'T FUCK WITH ME!" or Joanna upon falling to the ground "you didn't catch me bitches!...im just posing....for pics...... now im squiggliinging my way around now....yall are bitches!"

Thoughts for Next Year: Go again....regardless of time and space. Also try not to make fun of joanna so consistently....